Second Chances for the Soul
by Ms Llewellyn
Summary: Severus Snape has been found out as spy before Dumbledore's last request has been fulfilled. Tortured and on the cusp of death, he apparates to the forbidden forest. Fates not done with Severus yet... ON HOLD TILL FURTHER NOTICE!
1. Prologue

**Second Chances for the Soul**

**Summary:**

_Severus Snape has been found out as spy before Dumbledore's last request has been fulfilled. Tortured and on the cusp of death, he apparates. Misjudgment in the destination and the distance, he appears in Edwards field. Unconscious he awakes up in Forks Hospital, his magic drained. Snape might be a werewolf instead of a vampire. Werewolves live for an eternity in my world._

**Prologue**

**Severus POV**

There comes a time in life were the choice between life and death becomes crucial in the advancement of a greater purpose. My time had come. I have straddled the line between life and death, dark and light, for many years; I've seen the atrocities that both sides have, one masked the other prominent. They think they're different, one side entirely good, the other entirely bad - what most don't see is that they are merely extensions of each other. Without life there cannot be death, without light there can be no darkness. I've seen the evils in the light and I've seen the good in the dark - this war is a war between opposites that cannot exist without the other and it is a war that can never be won.

I die, its over; I live and we still have a chance.

I've spent these last few months licking the dirt off the Dark Lords feet with nothing but a little bit of information to go on. Until earlier. He hid it from me, all the crucial information that could have changed and saved lives. I'd spent a better part of my adult life answering to one man or another, following without question and protecting the ungrateful ass of a teenage boy. In the end it would seem that the boy is to die. I gave up everything to keep that little shit alive, only to find, in order for the Dark Lord to fall, Potter has to die at the tip of his skeletal white wand.

I feel I've failed. And I despise that feeling. I promised and made an unbreakable oath. Damn Dumbledore. Damn Prophecies. Damn Lily. Damn Marauders. Damn James Potter. Damn Sirius Black. Damn Remus Lupin. Damn Peter Pettigrew that filthy disgusting rat. Damn the Dark Lord. Damn this war. Damn Harry Potter. Damn the Order of the Phoenix. Damn Promises. Damn emotions. Damn Horocrux's. Damn Students. Damn Hogwarts. Damn Ministry.

And Damn that motherfucking werewolf pacing before me. Fuck Greyback. I could damn the whole fucking world, it wasn't going to change that, yes, I was going to die and I didn't have much of a choice. Couldn't apparate, damn bastards stole and snapped my wand. I don't know if I have enough in me to do a wandless apparation. It takes amazing concentration, an amazing amount of magic. I'd need to take down my occlumancy shields - shit, I've lasted three days beneath all their wands and it hasn't broken. Secrets must be kept. Shields are magic. Needed the chance though - couldn't fail any further, promised. Bloody Unbreakable Vows.

Greyback paced and snarled and saliva dripped from his yellow teeth as his back arched and his fur bristled in anger. The silver cage held him at bay for the moment. Voldemort stood behind it, a smirk on his lips, his eyes glinting in amusement. Greyback's yellow eyes glinted with hunger. They were wild, insane. The man was gone, but the man wasn't very sane either.

I let my shields drop and kept my eyes on the beast. It couldn't read my mind; if I looked up, he'd know everything I knew. I watched every paw step in front of the other, I felt the excitement of the others around me, all safe and tucked above the arena. Sadists. Images swirled in my thoughts, past conversations, emotions raged and I was an open book. Everything I fought to hide, everything I fought to keep myself functioning swirled in a tempest to the forefront of my mind and the pain in my body became prominent.

_Lacerations from hexes, whips and knives, Death Eaters. Muscles clenching and unclenching from the cruciatus, Dark Lord. Body slightly numb, Poison, Bellatrix. Broken nose; Breathing shallow, understandable, bruised, two fractured, three broken ribs; Headache and nausea - head wound, concussion, MacNair. Lost feeling in the right arm - possible nerve damage, Yexley. An irritating itch beneath the skin - Lucius and his bone burning hex._

I cataloged it all.

_Concentrate. Feel the magic, pull it, release it, and breathe. Concentrate on breathing, on building it. Feel it. Warmth, power._

Greyback rammed against the silver cage, a howl pierced the air. My gaze never wavered, but my concentration broke.

_Breathe, Concentrate._

_Ignore the cheers and the geers. Ignore the smells, the sounds._

_Its quiet._

_There's no one here, just me and the wolf. Breathe, concentrate, warmth. Magic, pull and release. Concentrate, don't break your gaze. Will it, wield it, accept it, release it. Let it flow, inside and out. Breathe in and out. Concentrate._

Voldemort lifted his wand and flicked his wrist. The silver cage door creaked open slowly before it swung open and Greyback dashed from his confines.

_Concentrate. Determination, Destination, Deliberation. Forbidden Forest._

I watched steadily as the yellow eyes got closer and closer as the ratty looking grey wolf charged at me, its jaws open, drool frothing and dripping. Rage and Hunger. I was its prey, weak and vulnerable. Easy pickings.

_Determination, Destination, Deliberation. The three D's of Apparition. Concentrate. The Forbidden Forest, Hogwarts._

Greyback's jaws clamped onto my shoulder and his claws racked across my chest. Pain flared and I breathed in and out. Greyback's growl rumbled in his chest and rippled across me. My gaze was getting spotty.

_Concentrate. Determination, Destination, Deliberation. Forest, safety. Crack!_

My magic swelled around us and I released it. There was a resounding pop and everything went black and it seemed as if I was being compressed into a straw. I could still feel Greyback's jaws, but there was a yelp. I couldn't breathe as the magic compressed my lungs, it felt like an eternity. And in a rush I landed with a thud, Greyback's jaws ripped through my shoulder as we landed.

Pain flared and consumed me and I fell beneath the depths. Darkness quickly became the only thing I knew.


	2. Chapter 1

**Second Chances for the Soul**

**A/N: **_Change in plans...Severus didn't apparate to forks, he apparates to the forbidden forest with Greyback__. You know what, disregard the summary, what happens, happens! No Idea where I'm going with this. _

**Chapter 1**

**Severus POV**

I was in a dark place - quite literally. War has always been a dark time, it called to the part of me that craved chaos. I craved the tainted power that rose from the earth in mists, it fell over mountains and tainted souls. It was home. But this place could only be my darkness, the one that lurks beneath my skin and in my magic. It felt void, an abyss. But I knew it was cluttered. This was the place I tried to stay away from, this place was an addiction. It held the secrets to so many things, some legal, others bordering on legal, and even more beyond that line set by society. It was a wealth of knowledge that could consume if it wasn't watched.

It was a place I locked away so long ago. It took the death of a loved one to open my eyes and see that it wasn't I that controlled it, but it, that controlled me. And the small dot of light, barely a speck in this jaded place - was the vow. An Unbreakable vow to protect, to spy, to survive, to kill. It kept me sane when I was weak and this place managed to slip past my shields and bleed into my soul. It kept it from consuming me, taking me back to that horrid time of my youth. I was idiotic then, young and arrogant. Many would say I was the same, but my arrogance become pride and my youth grew into wisdom. I know better now. Not that many would think so, after that stunt in June. A great plan that made me truly a monster in the eyes of wizarding society - I would say it was a toss up between the Dark Lord and I on who society feared more.

Not many would know Albus Dumbledore beyond his Grandfatherly persona, but in truth - in war, he was a cold, ruthless, intelligent general that would put emotion last and what needed to be done, first. Well when it came to everyone else, but the Potter boy. That boy held a special place in that mans stained heart - how could that boy not. His eyes so much like his mothers, no matter how much I despise that boy, he was his mother's son and his father's son. A combination of personality and looks, of mannerisms. It was like looking at a time capsule. It pained to look at him.

To Albus, each and every person were chess pieces in this ruthless game between the light and dark. Potter the Queen and the rest, merely rooks, pawns, knights, and bishops. Albus had always been the King, till he was knocked from the board. I could remember what pulling my wand on the old man had been like, how it split something inside of me and feed it to that ball of tainted magic. Death had always been the biggest taint in magic, just like love had been the biggest strength in light magic. A Love strong enough could halt death in its tracks - the potter boy and his mother's gift a prime example of magic in its infinite potential. Not many would realize it, but Albus Dumbledore had been the only death on my soul. Don't miss understand me, I have killed many, perhaps not with my wand, or my own hands. But my actions that advanced the old mans plans had brought death to many and life to very little. To choose who lived and who died is a weight many would crumble under.

It was like I was Atlas and the world rested upon my shoulders; It had threatened to crush me, but I stood strong, not because I could, but because I had too. As long as I lived and this war was still being fought, I could not fall. But I grow weary and it would seem that the exhaustion in my body, mind and soul had finally caused that world to fall from my shoulders, and drifting in this mist, I watched it roll away from me.

Albus' plans had fallen, scattered before me and a sense of defeat filled me. I had failed. I had killed a mentor and friend to gain the position to watch the Dark Lord, to help the Potter boy win this war and it was for naught. It was a weight upon my soul. I wondered, how long it would take before my physical body gave out. Torture and then Greyback - surely Death was at my door.

I have stood and glared Death in the face for many years, mocked and goaded it, perhaps now it would retaliate. Death meant peace, but it also meant facing the one man I dearly didn't want to disappoint. It meant facing guilt and shame in the body of a woman with emerald green eyes and fiery red hair, a sister of my soul, an old friend and an unrequited love. Death meant facing my anger, my pain in the form of childhood enemies. It meant facing regret and sorrow in the form of the many that had fallen because of my choices. It meant facing everything I buried for Twenty years. Was I ready to face any of it - no. Death had been a friend, an enemy, an acquaintance and a lover. I did not fear death, I feared what it brought.

In this place, Physical pain and awareness was beyond me. Sight and sounds just beyond my grasp. Staring at the glowing ball that slowly disappeared, perhaps I should have reached for it - but just as my body gave into the darkness, so do I eternally. If I die, so be it. If I live, my life is changed forever - I have failed only to gain a curse. If I lived I faced imprisonment.

Giving in is so easy. Just toss everything aside and fall, staying afloat is the hardest thing to accomplish. I just didn't have the strength anymore. Disappointing, down right disgust - twenty years and in the end I give up! The thought is revolting, but true. It is a thought I'll live with forever, well, better rephrase - it is a thought I will die with. Because death is the only thing in my horizon. The last moments aren't of battle, or seeing the end of this ridiculous war; its being mauled by a werewolf, left to bleed to death, shrivel away to where ever I end up. I was aiming for the forbidden forest - to die on the outskirts of the only home I had, its not a bad thought. Of course, no one will mourn me, thats just grand; I don't need sympathy or pity from those braggots! To know that the very castle itself will miss me is enough - not many notice but, the castle itself is sentient. Magic build up, evolved into what Hogwarts is today - trick staircases and ears for walls. The only one to know what I've sacrificed this year and the only one to comfort me when I needed it. It is a friend and nurturer - even the middle aged need guidance.

As the last of my will fell away, the darkness and chaos inside of me became a tempest. It became everything I wished to ever achieve, to conquer, it became my life and my death. It was a security blanket and a dementor. It ate at me, chipped away at my soul - and that speck that kept it at bay disappeared and I'm lost to this addiction. In death, I feel the power I wished to achieve all those years ago and its wonderful and revolting. So far I have fallen in my last moments.

I wonder if I were to gaze into the amber eyes of Fenrir Greyback would I be consumed with memories of that foul incident all those years ago - a trick played by arrogant boys that could have ended in death. I never thought death would be so empty - I suspected a slideshow of my past crimes to flash before my eyes. All I can say is, Death is like falling asleep - only you never wake up.

**Normal POV**

A resounding crack split the air and the trees of the forbidden forest groaned as the silence was penetrated, with a heavy thud and animalistic yelp two figures fell from the sky - one thrown from the other. The largest of the two, a large beast with amber eyes, glistening fangs and sharp talons for claws landed and rolled before it hit a tree. The smaller of the two, a half-naked man, torn apart, bits of skin barely hanging on slammed into the ground and the sound of bones snapping pierced the air.

The wolf itself, a child of the moon, snarled as it tried to find leverage on its shaky limbs. Grey fur glistened beneath the face of the full moon. The wolf, a monster of a beast that stood at least six feet in height, muscles rippled with strength and piercing eyes filled with anger, hunger, and an eternal sadness turned their insanity upon the prone human. Hunger rumbled in his stomach and madness clawed at its mind. Insanity on the cusp of releasing - deep inside a sadist human laughed and revealed in his inner beast bloodlust.

It had one day a month to seek its anger out on others for its captivity and this pale, skinny, dark haired excuse for a human was within its sights. It hated humanity, it wanted freedom. As it stood, its stance firm - it turned its body towards the human, a rumbling growl that vibrated through his chest and into the ground slowly grew in tempo and the forest whispered urgency for the frail and dying man to wake up, defend. It cried for the Headmaster. And the man who had given up, ignored its call, its cried silent to the tempest of dark magic that swirl within his very being and that was slowly leaking out and into the ground around him.

With each step the monster took towards the human, it salivated at the thought of tearing its flesh from its bones, to drink the blood that would spill and to chew and gnaw on the bones that would give under the strength of his jaw. But before it could get to close - it paused mid-stride, its ears perking.

It came on the wind, a gentle song growing in volume. A trill, a bird song filled the darkness driving it away. Shadows retreated before it and Amber eyes looked towards the skies - a speck of light in the darkness that was growing steadily as it got closer. The speck of light, became a flame and inside that flame was an exotic bird - its plumage a mixture of ruby red and fiery orange.

A phoenix. The only one to exist in a hundred years - came to the aid of its new master. Its trill grew angry as it descended upon the wolf, its talons sharp and piercing. It screeched and hissed and the jaws of the large beasts snapped in retaliation. But steadily the bird was gaining the upper hand, the wolf stepped back with each swipe of the birds claws. Muscles and skin tore beneath the birds onslaught and with a final snarl and an angry glance at its evening meal - it turned and ran deeper into the forest.

With a cry of victory, the Phoenix turned towards the Hogwarts Headmaster and his new master - a faithful and loyal friend of his last master and with gentle care he gripped the mans shoulders careful of the mans wounds and with a cry and in a burst of flame the two disappeared from the forest, only to appear on the cold stone floors of the seventh floor of Hogwarts castle.

A trill filled the infirmary and it roused healing students from their slumber, who in turn, turned awed eyes towards the beauty the bird radiated. The matron of the hospital, in a sleepy daze stumbled from her chambers - that were adjacent from her office - following the call and as she spied the red bird perched on the bloody chest of the Headmaster, her eyes widened in disbelief and the birds name fell from stunned lips.

"Fawkes..."

Fawkes had returned.

**A/N: **_Okay, finally a first chapter. Sorry, if Severus POV is a bit confusing - he is dying, I think he's a bit entitled to jumbled thoughts. Anyway, hopefully its okay and not a total mess. If it is I apologize, that also goes for if Severus sounds out of character, He's got a personality that I just don't have, but I should get brownie points for trying. Yay, Fawkes is back and yes Severus is Fawkes new master as stated above. Please leave a review. See ya._

**_~ Ms Llewellyn_**


	3. Chapter 2

**Second Chances for the Soul**

**Chapter 2**

**McGonagall's POV**

I thought I had seen all the shocks this year that it could bring; I was wrong.

As of twelve months ago I thought I knew both Albus and Severus and all it took was a couple of seconds for the film covering my eyes to be tugged and discarded like it was never there. Again, I feel that emotion. Was anything in this world real? How many people have been lying to me? How many could I trust, how many were allies, enemies?

Three days that little slip of a man disappeared, left this school without a headmaster - it had been my duty to take up the mantle. Taking the place of another, opens the eyes to all the secrets they held. Like when I ventured for the first time in a year to the Headmasters Office, I was expecting to find a make shift potions lab; he had made such a show of moving into the quarters at the beginning of the year. I expected all of that was Albus to be moved and be replaced by all that resembled Severus Snape's personality inside and out.

Again I was wrong. It was the same, exactly the same, an organized chaos. It was as if Albus Dumbledore had never been killed, it was as if he only stepped out for a bit and would be back latter. The familiar heat of tears prickling the corners of my eyes began as I eyed the open tin of small round hard muggle candies -Sherbet Lemons. The only thing that seemed like Severus had even come into this room were the parchments with his spidery scrawl littered across the table top and the lone journal open on the side table by the fire, a half empty glass of Ogden's Finest Firewhiskey. Severus always did have good taste, I could give the bastard that.

I couldn't understand, or perhaps I didn't want to.

But what really drew my attention and opened my eyes to the reality of the people around me, was the glowing crack in a book case. Behind said bookcase, the shimmery depths of a pensive shone out - images swirled, never really forming. I knew by all accounts that I shouldn't have looked inside, should have kept my nose out of it, but I was a cat and I was plagued by unquenchable curiosity. And I terribly missed Albus, if only to gaze upon his face and into his twinkling eyes - it would be enough for me. He had always been a friend, no matter what people thought our relationship was; it was never beyond platonic. Albus Dumbledore was as gay as a Faery on elf-wine.

I emersed myself in the memories, not really sure which one. All of them; it was a breathe of fresh-air to stare at him, to hear his voice. And memory after memory, I wept for his loss. But all tears halted as one memory shone out. Staring into the young face of a very twitchy eighteen year old Severus Snape - it was a side of the man, I had never seen. What followed was beyond words - to hear such disgust drip from Albus' lips as Severus begged for him to save the Potter's, only at the price of his very own servitude. I saw a side of Albus, that in my mind was no different then Voldemort. All views from Albus' side, I wondered, would these memories feel different if I were to glimpse them from Severus' mind themselves?

It went down hill from there. From the unbreakable vow that I could visibly see hold a darkness in Severus at bay, that his love for Lily kept in check - to Harry's first year all the way up to the end. It all seemed so surreal - but undoubtedly real. All of it had been orchestrated by a master general and played by a very brave man, a man no one knew at all. And suddenly Albus' memories were gone and were replaced by darker, more sadistic memories.

I watched the memories Severus surely couldn't deal with. I watched him wield death over strangers; I watched as he made tough decisions that would eat at him for months; I watched him drown himself in his sorrows to the bottom of a bottle. I watched each face he carved into his memory, each set of eyes for every victim. I watched as he visited those graves - how he cried and begged for their forgiveness and I watched as he locked all those feelings away. I watched as he became the man I knew today, or the man I thought I knew today.

I watched as his innocence vanished. I watched as a lively young man grew into a cynical bitter man. I watched as he sacrificed his life to undeserving citizens. I watched with each memory as the darkness behind ebony eyes grew in depth. How could he function? How could Albus' let this go on. How could we let this go on? As I left the pensive, I was sure I was pale, my eyes haunted from what I've seen.

"What have we done?" I whispered to the empty office, not expecting to be answered, but I was all the same.

"What you were expected to do." I turned my haunted green eyes and found them caught by the twinkling blue eyes I found comfort in just a year ago. He was awake. I felt relieved and angry. I felt conflicted. We all had a hand in this, all of us were responsible for the destruction of a soul.

"To kill the only thing that really matters in this world?" I said, my voice oddly detached. "Souls can't be replaced."

"No, I'm afraid that was of my own doing; you were ignorant of reality, of the perils and sacrifices that needed to be faced and made." He said. "Innocence can't be saved in war and he is far from innocent when he came to me, Minnie."

"Don't! He came to you for help and instead you tie him to you," I hissed. "You used an already broken man, manipulated him - you manipulated everyone! - for a foot hold in this war and you expected him to go at it alone."

"Some journeys must be taken alone."

"Not this one!"

"Why are you fighting for him, it was only months ago that you wished him dead." I stalled. It was true. I glared.

"Everything changes with time." And sometimes it only takes seconds to reshape thoughts, actions, and events. My world had shifted, my views changed - for the better, I am unsure, but I hope.

"Never have truer words been spoken." He had the gall to twinkle, like everything was okay. Nothing was okay and at this point I was sure nothing ever would be.

**Normal POV**

_Hogwarts Infirmary_

Poppy Pomfrey just about fainted at the sight of the Phoenix. Its been eleven months since Fawkes was seen. Was this a symbol of hope, or merely a symbol that the end was coming. Poppy was knocked from her thoughts when Fawkes opened his beck and trilled a sad melody. And it was then she noticed the body beneath the bird.

"Good Heavens!" she whispered grasping her wand striding towards the body. She recognized the body of Severus Snape and if it weren't for her Medical vow to help all those who need it, she was sure she would let his body rot were it lay. But why was Fawkes with this despicable man? Her step faltered as if actually contemplating leaving him dying on the floor. Her lips thinned into a frown.

Fawkes trilled again, his head coming down to rub against the mans cheek. A few tears dripped into the slightly open mouth before Fawkes flew to the nearest bed and landed on the bed post his head bobbing as if saying _'here, place him here!' _

Mummering a levitation charm she guided him towards the bed. Placing him down, she noticed the students that occupied beds were gazing unabashedly. With a flick of her wand the curtains closed, blocking out unwanted gazes. Swiftly she cast diagnostic spells after diagnostic spells and soon a whole list of the acrabic mans injuries were on display above him.

"Poison," she mummered. Fawkes trilled happily, he had taken care of that with his tears. Her eyes widened as her eyes skimmed one of his injuries.

"Oh dear. Ogden!" With a pop the Head of the House Elves of Hogwarts was standing as tall as he could a fierce look on his face. Poppy turned to the slightly sour house elf. "I need you to retrieve Professor McGonagall, please."

"Of course Madam of Healing" he said with a boy and with a pop he was gone. With a flick of her wand she got to work on healing Hogwarts current Headmaster.

**A/N:**_ Could be just me, but it seems so weird to call Severus Headmaster. LOL. Anyway hopefully it was good. Please leave a review, bye. _

_~** Ms. Llewellyn**_


	4. Chapter 3

**Second Chances for the Soul**

**Chapter 3**

**Poppy's POV**

I worked disconnected from the patient. If I didn't, I couldn't help this monster. His heart was black and his soul dead. I had believed in the best of him just months ago, to think that little insecure boy of eleven had vanished and replaced by a murderous heathen. It breaks a womans heart to know the man you've mended for twenty-seven years, and practically adopted as your own is a murderer.

I hated how his protectiveness of the students vanished and he allowed Death Eaters into these halls. The castle no longer breathed with laughter, but an ominous shadow clung to the walls. Even now, my hospital wing looked bleak - like it wasn't a place of healing, but a place of death. I was sure, soon it probably would be.

I have had more students since Severus became Headmaster inhabiting these beds then all other years at Hogwarts. The scuffles between Slytherin and the rest of the houses have gone beyond inter school rivalries. They became wars. Wars children shouldn't be fighting. Teachers cursing students, students cursing students - this wasn't an institute of learning anymore.

With a flick of my wand, the ribbons of cloth that clung to his body disappeared and the damage was before me. Large jagged scars across his shoulder, torso, and hip, a bite radius the size of a quaffle on his neck that steadily bleed, but was slowly stopping possibly due to Fawkes tears - my eyes flickered upward towards the red, gold, bronze, and orange bird that rested on the headboard, his head tilted towards Severus in a quiet sadness - and the rest of his body was covered in lacerations, bruises, broke bones, and finally I saw the quivering muscles. Cruciatus. I had spent the better part of a year diagnosing students and healing them to recognize the symptoms.

This man had been beaten, chewed and spat out. By all pretenses he should be dead. Only he wasn't and I couldn't help but wonder what God was on his side. How did he keep coming close to death only to escape from its skeletal claws? With pursed lips, I summoned an antiseptic potion. With a small flick and whispered _Evenesco_ the blood cleared leaving me with a clear view of all the injuries; I uncorked the purple potion and tipped it pouring the liquid on the larges of wounds. It hissed and smoked as it sterilized the wound.

Anybody would have cried out or flinched, but this man was so far out the pain didn't even register.

"_Valunera Sanentur," _I whispered running my wand along the lacerations and gouges, I watched what blood leaked flow back into the body, I whispered it again and watched the lacerations nit back together, but the claw marks barely closed. I whispered it again and watched the pink scarred lacerations almost disappear leaving thin white lines, but still the claw marks nitted slowly, leaving puckered red irritated skin.

"Fawkes, could you -" I gestered towards puckered scars. With a trill, he hopped up beside Severus, tilted his head and cried upon the wounds. They eased into a soothing pink, they truly weren't healed and they would hurt for days to come. Nothing could heal the wounds of a werewolf, except for time. And I can't help but feel like he deserved the curse.

Perhaps that made me a terrible Healer, but I couldn't give myself to care about it. Not for this man.

"Thank you Fawkes." With a quick trill, the Phoenix lopped up beside Severus head and settled down tucking his head against the mans cheek. This bird was a baffle, how could such a light creature stand to be near such darkness? I could feel it rolling off of the wizard.

"_Accio Bruise Removal Paste." _I smoothed the foul smelling yellow paste over the bruises that I could see, avoiding the broken bones. Flicking my wand I banished the paste, using my wand I removed the broken bones. "_Accio Skelgrow." _I poured the potion down his throat, smoothing my hand cross his throat. "_Accio Muscle Relaxant." _That one was next. "_Accio Nerve Damage Potion." "Accio Pain Releaver,""Accio Dreamless Sleep."_

"Poppy, my dear, how is Severus?" came a familiar voice. I turned eyes towards the Portrait across from Severus bed. Albus was awake. His blue eyes twinkled - if that was even possible for a portrait - and smiled at me. I was frozen in my place, I didn't even react when the Hospital wing doors were opened and a huffing and puffing red faced Minerva swept in like a dragon. I stared. All coherent thought left and I couldn't help but wonder.

_What in Merlin's name was going on!_

**_A/N: _**_Okay its a bit short, but thats okay, they're all short. Please leave a review. Bye._

**_~Ms Llewellyn_**


	5. Chapter 4

**Second Chances for the Soul**

**Chapter 4**

"Oh, Severus.." Minerva whispered stepping past Poppy. The Potions Master looked as if death had claimed him, it was only by the up and down motion of his chest that contradicted the notion of death. He was alive, wounded, broken, but alive. It was only then did she noticed the Phoenix curled up against his shoulder, neck, and head. The feathers were still the same red, orange, gold, and bronze as all those months ago, before the exotic creature disappeared.

"Fawkes," she said reaching out to pet the bird. Fawkes blinked gold eyes up at the Depty Head, a low trill of comfort fell from his beak as he butted his head against her approaching hand, but not once did he make a move to leave the current Headmaster's side. "Welcome back." Minerva turned weary eyes towards Poppy.

"Poppy, what's his condition." she said.

"So close to death," she said, spite heavily hung in each word. Minerva's eyes narrowed, but she could understand the Medi-wizards hatred. It had only been hours ago since the same hatred, perhaps not hatred, but disappointment and sorrow that ran through her very veins. "Several bouts of the Cruiciatus, a slicing hex, several broken bones that are in the process of mending, and he was mauled - " Poppy paused "by what looks to be by a werewolf."

Minerva's eyes widened and she looked back towards the sleeping man. Cursed by the very thing he feared. Severus had always had a fear of werewolves since the incident in his fifth year with Potter and his friends. Just another thing they had ignored, another thing, that had him stain his soul with the embodiment of the Dark Mark upon his skin and soul. They have failed him over and over again, it was a wonder Severus stayed on the side of the light.

"And he seems to have severe magical depletion. Right now, he's no stronger than a squib."

"Great merlin," Minerva breathed "what was he doing!"

"I'd say wandless magic," chimed in the Headmasters voice. Fawkes chimed in with a trill, echoing the headmasters statement. "A great amount of it. Severus had always been a strong lad, but to use wandless magic in his condition is extraordinary."

Minerva glared at the Headmaster.

"Don't you give him praise when he can't even hear it!" she hissed.

"If I may Headmistress, what in great merlin's left testicle is going on?" Poppy was confused, tired, and didn't want to deal with the students that lurked beyond the curtains no doubt dropping eaves on their very conversation.

"Right, you aren't aware...Poppy if I may with hold this information for a little longer; I have a request. Gather the staff (except the Carrows) and contact the Order of the Phoenix and have them here within the next day, have them adjourn to the staff room. There is much to be explained," Minerva turned towards the Headmaster who was currently invading some poor portraits portrait. "And you, you are going to explain every last detail - and I mean everything, starting twenty years ago. Or so help you, I will burn your portrait to the ground."

"Of course Headmistress." Poppy left, but not without placing a charm on the Headmaster's body that would alert her to his waking. No matter how much she despised the man, there were answers here and she would be civil to have them. But they had better be damn good answers.

"Come now Minnie," Albus started and was the last thing Poppy heard before she disappeared from the hospital wing, snapping at the wide awake inhabitants to sleep.

"Don't you Minnie me, Albus Wulfric Percival Brian Dumbledore! Your shenanigans have caused enough damage, look at him! It's time you came clean, not just for ours but his as well." For a moment Albus managed to look ashamed before it vanished and was replaced with a petulant look. The whiny twit.

"Very well, Minerva." he said before he vanished. Minerva sighed and flicked her wand conjuring a chair and she took a seat beside Severus. She took his hand and gripped it lightly.

"Severus, I'm so sorry and when you wake, I'll try and make it up to you I promise." She whispered, reaching forward and moving a stray lock of hair. "I won't fail you again."

"Fawkes, I believe you've found yourself a good friend..." she said to the bird. The Phoenix just ruffled his feathers and burrowed his head beneath Severus Chin.

_**A/N: **Okay, I know its a bit short. I tried to put a Severus POV at he bottom, but he just aint going into words at the moment. So this is what I have so far! Hopefully it will tied ya'll over for a bit. Sorry if Jasper hasn't appeared, don't worry a few more chapters and maybe he'll appear; he's being stubborn and so is Severus - he doesn't want to leave England. But he will. Soon. Very soon. Enjoy the chapter. _

_**~ Ms Llewellyn**_


	6. Chapter 5

**Second Chances for the Soul**

**Chapter 5**

**Severus POV**

_... Severus..._

It was a whisper in my ear, a voice that encouraged. It wanted something; it wanted what I could give it. I knew what it was and I knew what it wanted. I had been drowning, staring up through the depths into a uneven sun - but it was replaced by the grounds of Hogwarts. I was no longer drowning in the Black Lake. It was sunny, there was the distant sound of children - students-, the trees of the forbidden forest creaked as a gentle wind disturbed the blades of grass and the castle; Hogwarts itself stood strong. A stronghold in a time full of travesty. It was a sanctuary. It was home.

My robes hung heavily on my skinny frame, I was drenched in lake water. I glanced towards the lake, flashes and images peered from beneath its depths. My memories. My feelings. Everything that had been me was there. There was a flash of green light and I looked away quickly before I could even glimpse the rest of the scene. I didn't need to study it, I knew it like the back of my hand - green light, pleading blue eyes - forget it Severus, don't think about it. The Black Lake had always been the visual wall that hid my thoughts.

"Severus, my boy, you look like you've taken a dip in the lake." I froze, not wanting to turn around. It was a voice filled with warmth, love and hope and I knew who it belonged too and I didn't want to turn around and stare into twinkling blue eyes that only ever viewed me with trust - excluding the night on that hill twenty-some years ago. Had it really been that long since this figure head stared at me with revulsion and distrust?

"Albus..." It fell passed my lips before I could even stop it. I missed him. His guidance, his friendship. I missed someone understanding what I was going through.

"So how was it, warm? Perhaps I can spare a few minutes before my afternoon tea with Minerva." I didn't turn around, but I could just image what he looked like - alive, happy, sucking on Sherbet Lemons and wearing those atrocious multi-colored robes with moving designs of a very adverse variety.

"Its wet." A large gust of wind blew across the lake and I watched as it rippled and the images become distorted. It wrapped around me and I couldn't help but feel something was different about the wind.

_...Severus..._

It seeped through my robes, brushed its icy fingers across my skin, and flooded my veins with a temperature that could rival any effects of a freezing potion or charm could produce. It made me feel numb, cold, dead. It was a familiar feeling.

"I would imagine so, " He chuckled. I flinched beneath the hand that rested against my shoulder - it was warm and it vaguely chased away the dead feeling. "Severus, tell me, how have you been?" I shrugged. I couldn't really answer that - perhaps tired. Tired of it all, this war, the scorn, the hateful looks, the act I was constantly playing. But with Albus even the smallest physical detail could tell him how a person was feeling - I'm not saying he's all powerful and all that hero-worship crap that seems to circulate around him is true; he is human and he wasn't infallible.

"I understand, but it isn't time to give up yet, there is still a ways to go before the end. Its going to get harder Severus, everything is going to change for you, don't push this change away - "I opened my mouth to speak, but the hand squeezed my shoulder. "Let me say this Severus. I know you have a thing about change, it isn't a terrible thing, it can be the greatest thing to happen if you let it. There is going to come a time when you'll need to co-operate with enemies. Enemies can become Allies if you let them. Let go of Childhood grudges, Severus. Trust me, you won't find what you need if you don't start moving."

Enemies? Death Eaters? No, Child hatred. Lupin?

"Albus," I started and stopped. Change, I've never liked change. Change had never been kind.

"Severus, look at me." he said, his voice firm. I listened. And I did not like what I see. I would imagine me eyes are open in horror - Albus had never looked so...dead. His eyes didn't twinkle, in fact they looked to be covered in a thin film, and he looked to be decaying. He had been thin before, but this was - not imaginable. "Can't you hear it? Can you see what its doing to you?"

_...Severus..._

It was a mumble in the air, a foreign sound, seductive and dark, my name the only thing recognizable about it - I knew exactly what it was.

The wind picked up and I watched helplessly as our robes fluttered in its grip and it appeared as if another part of Albus Dumbledore was chipped away. Behind me, I could hear the lake grow restless and I looked beyond Albus.

The peaceful scenery of the Hogwarts grounds had disappeared. This wasn't sanctuary or home. It was a waste land, the grass a disgusting grey, the skies rolled with rain clouds above and the trees looked gnarled and twisted and very, very dead. I didn't want to look at the castle. Something told me it wouldn't look as majestic as it usually did. The students voices no longer sounded and on the wind, beneath the seductive alluring language, a faint sound of crying reached my ears - she was crying. Hogwarts herself was weeping.

"If you can't except the change Severus, you'll loose the light that keeps this place alive."

"Albus I..." I didn't know what to say to reassure him that I wouldn't let it consume me or her, because I wasn't sure if I had the strength to hold it at bay. Twenty years is a long time to be fighting apart of yourself you've denied. But I promised to look after Hogwarts and her students when he died - and already I was doing a terrible job. Students were getting sent to the hospital wing every night - if I'm quiet enough while roaming the halls I can hear their tears and their anger.

The thing was I just didn't think I was strong enough anymore and admitting that to myself was the equivalent to a physical blow - I hated failure, particularly in myself. It unhinged my pride.

"I understand. It's all I can ask of you."

**_A/N: _**_Okay, Severus' POV finally came to me. I never knew how hard it was to be all philosophical like Albus - arg...anyway hopefully the chapter is enjoyable. Next, the ORDER MEETING and perhaps the Carrows visit the Hospital wing and Hogwarts herself comes to the rescue? Who knows yet. :P Please leave a review. Bye._

**_~ Ms Llewellyn_**


	7. Chapter 6

**_Second Chances for the Soul_**

**_Chapter 6_**

_Order Meeting_

It was three hours past midnight when Minerva entered the staff room, the room was hushed with exhaustion from its current occupants. In fact it looked as if Sybil could barely keep her eyes open. All eyes turned to her as stepped further into the room - there were select members from the Order (Moody, Molly, Arthur, Kingsley) and her staff (well Severus' staff, but the Headmaster was incapacitated currently.)

"I thank-you for coming swiftly. Shall we begin?" she said sitting down on a vacant chair in front of the roaring hearth, everyone else scattered around her pulled themselves closer. "You are aware three days before, Severus, disappeared. Three hours ago, he appeared in the infirmary unconscious, a threads bare from death."

"Good, bastard deserves it." snorted Moody. Minerva glared at the paranoid retired Auror.

"You'll hold ye tongue Alistair Moody, I wonna have ye slandering that man's reputation anymore than it already has. He deserves more respect than that, more than anyone in this bloody room." Her Scottish burgh coming through as anger coursed through her veins like fire. Many of the rooms occupants stared wide eyed, and flabbergasted - wasn't only hours before that Minerva McGonagall herself was cursing up a storm towards the man?

"Reputation? That boy ruined his own reputation, he lives up to his reputation, and he doesn't even deserve respect. Or have you forgotten past June's actions? Because of that man Albus is dead, gone and were in this fucking stalemate with Voldemort and that Potter boy has run off galevanting through the highlands." Moody snarled. His blue eye swirling, his already mangled face twisted in anger and disgust. Minerva could see why he acquired the nickname 'Mad-eye', he certainly looked quite mad.

"Mr Potter is 'galevanting through the highlands' as you say, due to Albus' request. And donna think I donna remember last June, but unlike then, I have a better understanding about that night and Severus actions with the information I have required."

"Are you saying there's more to it? Harry gave an a pretty accurate account, by Merlin, we even saw pensive memories of it." questioned Arthur Weasley.

"Aye, but those memories were from Mr Potter's perspective, not Albus' or even Severus'." She said. She glanced around the room's portraits. And frowned. Where was Albus?

"Ogden" she said firmly. There was a pop and the Head-Elf of Hogwarts appeared before her. "Can you tell Albus if he donna get his painted arse into the staff room, I'll burn his portrait to the ground."

"Yes Professor McGonagall, Ogden be doing that ma'am." And he was gone.

"Albus? I thought his portrait was sleeping?" questioned Flitwick.

"Just many of the secrets I have discovered these last few hours. Albus hasn't been sleeping since August when Severus arrived as Headmaster. We've never actually gone up to the Office this year not willing to be in his presence more than necessary, the only reason I even know the secrets I know is because I was being a snoop. But Filius, its like a tomb up there, everything is the same. It's like Albus never left, just stepped out momentarily."

And too the occupants of the room - what did that say about Severus Snape?

"Obviously Snape is twisted, probably left it the same so he can feel the pleasure he felt that night on the tower over and over again. I wouldn't put it past him, he's always had a thing for power." crowed Moody. Many of the occupants of the room hummed in agreement.

"I said hold ye tongue. You know of not what you speak."

"She's right you know, Alistair." came the wizened voice of Headmaster Albus Dumbledore. All eyes turned towards him, many tearing at the sight. He sat in a chair, a table with a tin of lemon drops at his side, his robes vibrant in death as they had been in life and his eyes - they twinkled like stars.

"Its good to see you all again. I'd offer a lemon drop, but -" he shrugged smiling, gesturing towards the tin as if it was obvious it was just mere paint on canvas but it didn't stop him from taking one and popping it into his mouth.

"Now that you have graced us with your presence, start talking and don't hold anything back," she hissed, "Because I'll know and burning your portrait will be the least of your worries."

"Come now Minerva, no need to be so hostile." He twinkled, "It would seem that the time for secrets has come and past. Many of you are not aware of the extenuating circumstances that lead up to that night on the tower when Severus cast the killing curse. I'm sure many of you have noticed my hand through out the year?" Nods were generous.

"How many of you are aware of Harry's task?"

"Not a lot, Harry really didn't talk about it. He only said that you asked this of him. But what's that got to do with Severus?" Molly said. It wasn't for lack of trying, but Harry was closed up tighter than Fort Knox and that unsettled the poor woman, whose child was off in the wilderness somewhere, in constant dangers, especially with those damn snatchers out there.

"Everything, Molly, Everything."

"Albus stop being omniscient." chimmed in Minerva.

"Right, sorry my dear. Tell me what do you know about Horocruxes?"

A murmur rose across the room. The Teaching staff and selected members of the Order glanced at each other.

"I've been an Auror for more than forty years, Albus, and never have I heard one utterance of the word." grumbled Moody.

"Not surprising, its a lost art. A very _dark_ lost art. And my hand, does anyone know?"

"No, only Snape seemed to know." squeaked Filius, "It seemed he was the only person you were conversing with all year."

"Ah, yes. There are many things in Severus talents, particularly his potions skills." he said. "I think it's time I told you a story," he said.

TBC...

_**A/N: **Omg, I squeezed this out through my brain like it were a sieve. hopefully its a satisfactory chapter. I'll try to update sooner. _

_~Ms. Llewellyn_


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